Saturday, July 9, 2011

Hey Art Linkletter, kids STILL say the darnedest things

Friends keep reminding me to right down grandson, Tristan’s latest comment. It is a joy to see and hear life being lived through the eyes and ears of a clever, outspoken five year old, although he will tell you, "I'm six on the inside." And when he turns six in August? "I'll let you know, Mimi, when I'm seven on the inside." I’m also reminded lately that Tristan is not the only child that provides great laughter for the adults in their lives.

As readers of this blog and my Facebook page know, my husband John has a photography exhibit opening tomorrow. Tristan came over this week when just before all the photos were to be delivered to the Woodford County Library. I gave him one of the publicity cards and invited him to see a few of the photos that were in tubs in the living room. I encouraged him to take the card home to Mommy and Daddy to remind them to bring him to the exhibit. He looked with interest at the photos we unwrapped and went on with him playing. In a few minutes, he looked up at me and stated, “Mimi, I’m not the kind of boy who goes somewhere just to look at pictures.”

All righty then.

One of my friends has two little girls, nine and six. My friend, intent on looking great for her twentieth high school reunion, engaged a personal trainer. The girls walked in as she and the trainer were lying on the floor facing each other doing leg lifts. After they left the gym, the girls inquired, “Mom, what were you doing with that guy?”

Being a thoughtful mother, my friend gently responded, “What did you think I was doing.”

They giggled and replied together, “Farting and falling in love.”

Ahhhh, the child’s perspective.

One of my favorite of the “darnedest” comes from a friend telling this story on her son when he was three years old. On a Christmas visit to family, they decided to dress their two little boys up and take them to the very adult, very upscale cocktail party next door. Dressed in their navy blazers and grey slacks, they knew instantly this was a big deal to be allowed at the adult gathering. The three year old wandered around a bit and then moved close to a female guest. He stretched his arm casually across a piece of furniture, put his foot up on another piece to create his best debonair look and announced to the woman, “I have a penis.”

Very adult, indeed!

Our Tristan adopts the attitude that he can win at anything and everything and perhaps it is even his Divine Right to win every game. He and I were racing cars while he soaked in the tub at about age four. I allowed him to win the first two races and then made sure I won the third. I whooped and hollered in victory. He gently touched my arm and pleaded, “Mimi, let’s play nice and be friends.”

Guess he put me in my place.

Poppa and I recently had a discussion with him about his baby sister’s nickname. We all suggested possibilities and rejected them for this or that reason. Tristan then adamantly settled on, “Pony.” No amount of reasoning has dissuaded him that Pony is not a good nickname for his adorable toddling sis.

My favorite Tristan saying though came when he was three. Poppa and I had just arrived from North Carolina for a visit. He rushed up to me and announced, “Mimi, when I was a little boy I fell in love with you!”

I’m putty in his hands.

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